Rejection reviewed

Dear friends,

Nobody likes to be rejected – am I right?

But what if we would look at rejection from a different perspective…?

I felt that GOD had me rejected by everyone all the time for a long period of time now.
No matter what I was trying to build and no matter where I went, something would always happen, someone would literally slander me (happened in church for instance, that person is not there anymore, but my image has been damaged forever), or betray me (for instance when it comes to friendships I tried to build), would abuse me (mainly in my job(s)) and last, but not least, would neglect, ignore and hurt me – recently done by the very man I believed GOD sent me……….

It hurts.

Yes.

I know!

In my life, rejection has literally been “piling up” in all areas and over a long period of time.

And it pushed me down for a very long time.

I would say for a decade.

Until today.
Today, someone – once again – said something mean to me at work…..
First, I felt my usual “overthinking-and-repeating-what-the-person-said-and-then-saying-even-worse-things-to-myself”-mechanism being triggered off…….

But then something new and different happened:

I felt myself RELAX.

I felt PEACE.

And GOD gave me a different perspective.

So when someone rejects us, it could be:

• it has nothing to do with us, but only with them – because they don’t even take the time to understand our situation before they react – in other words, they are “projecting” (meaning they are using us as a canvas for their own issues and are seeing in us what is wrong with them, as if they were projecting “their film / their movie” unto our life).
  This was the exact case of today’s incident.
  I’ve known this person for years and they have always been showing me that they are a “projector”.
  Not so much towards me, but it is what they have been doing with other people.
  And today, they had even told me in the sentence before they had made this mean comment about me, that they are under so much pressure and that there is so much negativity in their life and that they don’t even know how to cope.
  Then they asked me how I was doing – I should have actually not told them anything, as it was just a question to be polite, but this person never wants to listen, they only want to talk about themselves, so my bad if I invite them to hurt me…. I told them that I am leaving the job, and they said “again?” – that’s all.
  I didn’t even say much more…..
  There was so much insult in that.
  And it was my fault.
  I had literally let them do that to me.
  But I am glad, because I realized something very, very important.
  What this person thinks of me is of absolute zero importance.
  In fact, I don’t think very highly of them either if I am truly honest.
  I don’t even think they are truly a born again Christian – which is arrogant, because who am I to know if someone has a real relationship with GOD or not?
  I am judging this person and at the same time, I am offended when they are judging me – it’s even funny!
  But what I am pointing at and where this led me today:
  people are always going to think about us what they want to think about us.
  Some will take the time to listen and will do their best to understand before they come to a conclusion, but most people won’t.
  And we are not always any better.
  Me, I honestly try to be.
  And this person has given me many opportunities where they have talked for ages about their issues without asking me anything and I felt used afterwards – but perhaps, today was even an effort of theirs to listen and hear more from me?
  Who knows?
  Maybe their way of speaking to me so much was their way of showing me that they like me and that they trust me and their response today was being honest with me?
  I don’t know and I don’t value this person enough to address that their comment hurt me – and that’s my mistake probably.
  
  However, what I learned is this: what other people think of us is not only absolutely out of our control, but also irrelevant, as it is not them whom we need to love us, we need GOD to love us and only HIM.
  People’s love is always conditional.
  Including mine.
  If someone does this, I will love them, if they do this, I will stop loving them or will be so angry at them that I will leave them no matter if I still love them or not, and then, I will eventually stop loving them after having left them for whatever reason.
  
• That’s another reason for rejection:
  If we don’t do what people want us to do.
  And what that means in 9 out of 10 cases?
  I believe it usually means they are asking or wanting us to do something which is against GOD’s will.
  Common example:
  if you are a single Christian woman, you will hardly find anyone who wants to still date you if you don’t want to sleep with them.
  Except if this man is a Christian himself.
  A true, committed Christian.
  There are many, many men out there who call themselves Christians, but they do NOT want to remain abstinent from sex before marriage and they are judging you for even suggesting so.
  So suppose you really, really like this guy……. oh, by the way, I am not talking theoretically, I have been there – 3 years ago, and I have written about it – I fell!!! – and I payed dearly for it – so, sis, I am not talking to you, I am talking WITH you!!!
  So let’s say he is everything you prayed for.
  Literally.
  And let’s take this further…… where will it take us?
  There’s only one possible direction where this can go:
  OUTSIDE and AWAY from GOD’s will for us!!!!!
  This is so significant, friends!
  A person who is inviting us to sin will take us AWAY from GOD.
  They will separate us from what WE want for our lives, from what we have been studying, from what we have been praying and fasting for, from our SALVATION, from living in paradise one day.
  So who do we follow when it comes to suggestions about what to do?
  GOD or (certain) people?
  Yes, those whom we do not follow will reject us indeed.
  THANK GOD they will.
  
• It could also be a sign that we are wrong.
  And that we need to correct ourselves.
  Apologize.
  Make something right with someone.
  But not necessarily so, only if it’s not an attempt to manipulate us.
  We don’t even need to tell the other person, but I believe it is always good to look for the “gold” in every criticism and rejection, there is always something to learn, even if it’s only that this is how the other person sees us…

Rejection is actually a blessing and a good sign.

It means that we are either “on track” and others are noticing and they are intimidated or irritated by our righteousness or they’re tempting us – or it is a sign that we need to check ourselves and it could be that we need to correct our course.

What’s the most important thing though is that GOD doesn’t reject us.

That HE is pleased with our course and our conduct and our behavior.

That HE loves us – and HE will, of course, whether we “behave” or not… but HE has standards and expectations and wants us to evolve and learn and better ourselves.

For me, sometimes disappointing people or certain people means being loyal to GOD….

And today, I felt really calm about this incident where someone rejected me and my plans or actions, because I know that GOD led me to hand in my notice, otherwise I wouldn’t have done it.
This person doesn’t seem to know that about me.
But then again, I don’t consider them to be walking closely with GOD, so why would they think that about me???
It’s not important what they think.
I don’t need to explain myself to them nor justify myself.
If they truly want to know more, they will ask….

What GOD thinks and says is important.

I am a child of GOD.

HE has accepted me.

HE loves me.

And HE loves you, my friend.

We have been accepted by GOD – this is so much more important than all the rejection in the world and of the world!

If you have not (yet) accepted GOD’s love and HIS sacrifice for us, please refer to the homepage of this blog and consider giving your life to JESUS.

I hope and pray that this will inspire, bless, encourage and heal you. And that THE LORD will bless you abundantly in all areas of your life; that HE will keep you and shine HIS face upon you and bring you peace. In JESUS’ name I pray. AMEN.