When love has to speak

Dear friends,

in the prison where I work, we have a Christian group, a bible study group, and this group meets once a week during our lunch breaks.

These meetings used to be the absolute highlights of my working week and I learned so much there and I was looking forward to this time in my week, to meeting like-minded people and talking with them. I even considered this group my “real team” in the prison and my team in my department only my “wordly team”.

Until one day, things changed.

We were early and there was only three of us, a brother, a sister and me.
And this brother shared some experiences from his church on the previous weekend – he told us what had happened and how he had been called as a prophet – and I froze when I heard what he was saying… it was one of the churches where people fall backwards and lay on the floor and where everyone believes that this is the spirit of GOD moving – he himself explained how he fell backwards and couldn’t move and so on and so forth…

Me, I do NOT believe this is the spirit of GOD in action when this happens.

Of course, I wasn’t there.

And I am not as full of myself to believe that I always know better than everyone else when the spirit of the enemy or THE HOLY SPIRIT is moving and I am well aware that I have only been a new born believer for almost 4 years now and that there are many things I yet have to learn.

At the same time, the way I became a new born believer is that I realized that the spirit in me was NOT the SPIRIT OF GOD and I think I can say that this skill to differentiate between them is what literally saved my life  – me, I can see the spirit of the dark side operate in many people, in many situations and in many places where I go –  all the time… I believe GOD gave me the gift of discernment.
To see what’s truly going on, but not just to see these things for myself, but also so that I could talk about them and expose the works of the enemy and render them useless – as I believe that this is part of my calling, to destroy the works of the devil in many areas or in as many as I can.

Unfortunately, I frequently keep seeing demons and satanic activities in many churches, too.
Just when we are inside a church building, that doesn’t necessarily mean that there is no evil there and no people who are actually even working for the devil – in fact (I know many of you will not agree with me on this one or won’t even like to hear me say this), the catholic churches are full of idols, idolaters, diviners and even their head, the pope, is trying to be a false god, yes, one of the false gods which OUR GOD forbids us to worship!, and he is trying to be this to all of his followers, they are as a corporate body trying to dilute and even contradict the doctrines and truths of the bible, just as many cults and other false religions are – so there is no surprise here when I see something evil or satanic happening in a church!
It even makes a lot of sense to me that the devil would mainly and foremost try to deceive and snatch people in the churches as we Christians, true Christians are the only ones who are truly safe from him and able to defeat him – the ones in the world are already his!

Basically, I have studied these things for many years and have asked GOD about them and I had to learn how to discern good spirits from evil spirits, I mean I had to learn this in order to survive, in order to free myself from the dark forces which have been trying to kill me and in order to know which voice to follow.
I’m not saying that I am the best and most definite judge to know which spirit is operating, all I am saying is that I have studied this exact topic and practiced discerning the spirits for many years.
And I have seen it many times and it has been confirmed many times that when I saw evil spirits at work.

Nowadays, I believe it is the spirit of Antichrist, the false, counterfeit “holy spirit” which makes people fall backwards and I also believe that in these churches, “another jesus”, not OUR LORD, but a false one, is being preached and glorified.

What this brother has been telling me made me avoid him for quite a long time… and when I decided to honor his request to have my number, it turned out very quickly that he is severely demonized and that he isn’t even aware of it and not even mature enough in his walk with THE LORD to receive a word of knowledge and take care of this issue, but is instead manifesting, attacking and accusing – and the man wants to become a pastor!
But that’s exactly what I mean!
He has been saved and ever since raised in this church which I am sure is a false church and the pastor calls him “King X (xbeing his first name)” and that is even already an indicator of what is being worshipped there: the ego!
When he told us this, he was so proud and bragging that he was one of the 4 the pastor had prophesied about… he wanted to impress us, wanted to demonstrate how holy he is…

Like I said, when this happened, I tried to avoid him for a good while, because I didn’t want to break his heart –  or arouse his anger, which later turned out to be his preferred response to being told that I perceive evil spirits around him.

This is a common dilemma.

At least for me.

And I have not yet learned to get over this more elegantly or smoothely, it is always causing a lot of “ado”.
I even had to leave quite a few churches because of it.
Not sure what THE LORD wants me to do with this.
But HE sure is bringing this into my awareness, into my life, into my closer sphere a lot lately.
And my take is that HE is not only training me further to recognize the spirit of antichrist when it is operating, that’s one thing.
But the other is that I perceive that HE wants me to fight for HIM and to confess HIM and to speak up when this happens.
So far, I have not spoken up a lot, my default response has beeen to leave  – so far.
And when I much later confronted this brother, I definitely lost him – and spared myself from a lot of trouble as he was obviously about to pursue me in a romantic way and that would have ended in a mere disaster – I mean, I am not saying that I am free from issues and that I am always perfectly able to relate to another person in a godly way, but at least I know that I used to be severely demonized and at least I am aware that these evil spirits will do anything to destroy any relationship of mine and that they will also do their best to deceive me and make me believe lies about the other person and about me, about us… I think these are things we all need to be aware of and to be mature enough to see them when they occur…

What a very popular plot of the enemy seems to be is that he stirs up their vanity so much that he succeeds in making them believe that anyone who is trying to warn them is truly jealous.
Of their anointing, of their gifts, of their calling…
That’s a clever one!
And I have never said that the devil is stupid.
He isn’t.
He is in fact very smart and he knows us humans very well, our weaknesses and how to fool us –  and vanity is his area where he is a specialist as he himself fell because he is so vain.

The thing is though, sooner or later, we have to tell them.

Ephesians 4:15
But speaking the truth in love, may grow up into him in all things, which is the head, even Christ:


And I believe GOD wants me to learn to tell people.
Tell entire churches even  – if necessary.
One of the pastors of the churches I left, he is actually sort of my spiritual father and I still love and respect him and we kept in touch every once in a while – he called me on the first day of the year to give his best wishes and he told me that he realized that what I had said about some “matters” was true and that GOD had used me to tell him this, but he had refused to listen…
I only really tried to argue with the leadership of one church and only to a minimum – I used my reasons for leaving to try to convince them that they are following the wrong doctrine –  to absolutely no avail to be honest, all they did was try even more to convince me to stay, convince me of their beliefs and to convince me that mine are wrong and I had to block so many people on my phone, they passed on my number on to everyone and all these people were calling me and are still calling me (or rather my mailbox) and trying to bring me back to the church – even though this is many months ago and even though I made it very clear that I wasn’t going to come back.

When I was thinking of having to tell this brother that he may be going to a church where they are teaching “another jesus”, I rehearsed this conversation in my head many times.
In the end, I put it off – only to be in a situation with him a little later where it was literally impossible not to say anything and where we ended up having this explosive conflict where he was very rude and now, we don’t talk any more…

Perhaps, if I had said something earlier, if I had prayed more about how to tell him and about what exactly to say to him, maybe it would have been possible for him to receive what I said.
Now, he only has resentments about me, but his issues are still unsolved.
This one didn’t go well.
I was unable to help him.
The only outcome was conflict and this point clearly goes to the enemy – this brother is not even going to think about it, at least not because of what I said… all I can do now is pray that he will come across someone else, someone who will be more skilled in delivering the message so that he can hear it.

Me, I hope and pray that GOD will give me the right words to say next time and that HE will give me humility to say them in a way that the person I speak to, like this brother, whom I know loves THE LORD with all his heart, will be able to hear what I have to say and will be able to pray about it rather than to be irritated or even angry or hurt about what I will have to tell them.

Have you ever been in that situation?

Have you ever had to tell someone that you believe that what they are saying or what they had encountered or found or experienced wasn’t from GOD?

I find this SO tricky and even a bit encroaching, because it is someone else’s experience and it is their experience of what they think is GOD… and I even remember how great and special and chosen and privileged I myself felt in the past when I was still divining, when all these demons were talking to me, masquerading themselves as angels, as “ascended masters” and I felt so excited and anointed and yes, special, special as in better than many other people… felt so special because they had chosen me, yes me, as their point of contact, as the vessel they would speak through…

After these things, after this time as a so called medium and channelling, I am even more cautious with the voices I hear or the visions I have and also with prophecies – my own and other people’s.

Not because I want to spoil someone’s fun, but because I know that prophecies and visions and revelations can come from GOD or from the devil and that there is not an obvious, very easily detectable difference between the two and that in fact many churches are operating under false, evil spirits.

I don’t know these things because I am so special and so chosen and so better than anyone else, I know these things because they are what GOD saved me from and taught me that they are false.
That’s the only reason why I know this.
If it had not been for the HOLY SPIRIT revealing the truth to me and pulling me out of the occult, I would still be there, would still publish angel messages (they were not obviously evil, not at all, they were very beautiful and wise and we mustn’t forget that the devil himself was an angel and that the bible warns us that he will disguise himself as an angel of light!) and would still not know the difference.
I do not take the credit for knowing the difference and for being able to discern the spirits.
I owe it to GOD and only because HE wanted me to learn do I know these things today.

But at the same time, I know that HE taught me these things for a reason and the reason is so that I could tell others when they are deceived.

It is what I try to do here and it is what I have to try in my life offline as well.

So I told this brother and it went terribly wrong.
But I will have to tell my future brothers and sisters.
Perhaps it will be good to share a little bit about me and about my testimony and then, I will humbly and gently ask them to pray about it and about what is happening in their church and I will invite them to test the spirit that is behind it when people fall backwards for instance – and the rest is not up to me, but to HOLY SPIRIT showing them the truth.

If they are mad at me like this time then so be it… but not telling them is not an option… would be very unloving… towards my brothers and sisters and most of all towards my BELOVED SAVIOR who showed and told me these things, so that I can be free today.

What would you do or say, my friend?
Or what did you do or say in a similar situation?
If you have any ideas or guidance (even though I will most likely let the HOLY SPIRIT guide me in that moment and also regarding the right moment) for me or others in a similar situation, please comment below.

I hope and pray that this will inspire, heal and bless you. And that THE LORD will bless you richly in all areas of your life, that HE will keep you and shine HIS face upon you and bring you peace. In JESUS’ name I pray. AMEN.

4 thoughts on “When love has to speak

  1. Pray for the wisdom of what to say and when to say it. Let the Holy Spirit guide you. You will speak the truth in love this way.. it’s not about you or him, but Christ and the Kingdom.. Praying with you my sister!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, my sister.
      GOD bless you!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. “ Have you ever had to tell someone that you believe that what they are saying or what they had encountered or found or experienced wasn’t from GOD?”
    This made me laugh because yes!!!
    But, a true brother/sister will accept a rebuke and/or the truth. Also, scripture says if they were one of us they would’ve remained with us, but because they were not one they went out from among us.


    1. Thank you for reading and commenting and GOD bless you.


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