Are you a planner?
Or do you like to go about life more spontaneously, taking things as they come?
Or perhaps a mixture of both?
Well, if you ever had a plan and it didn’t work out the way you wanted it to, what did you do?
Are you the type who will always have a “plan B”?
Or will it take you a while to get over your frustration and then you will think about a new, bettr, adjusted plan?
Me, I am not even sure about what type of planner I am… of course I know all the teachings and even literature about goals and planning and that it is not good to go about life without a plan – I even talk to my clients in prison about it every day, especially when it comes to their addiction and them wanting to maintain their abstinence, it is important, even vital for them to plan their life and plan for coping strategies when the temptations and urges come, because if they don’t plan for these situations, they are very likely to relapse and the old patterns are very likely to resurface and take back over if they are not conquered – by an alternative strategy…
However, I’ve been wondering lately about plans for my life and where they come from?
What I mean by this is, when we have faith and ask and pray for GOD to show us what HE wants us to do in life?
How does it then work with planning?
I mean, I am not even trying anymore to plan anything when I am not 100% sure it is what GOD wants for me.
I don’t want anything for me and in my life that’s not from HIM – that would just be such a waste!
Why would I go to bible school, read the bible every day, doing my best to complete my “read the bible from cover to cover in 1 year”- plan, even if some passages are sometimes a bit “boring” to get through, for instance all the genealogies in there or the specific instructions how to build something for GOD with what sacrifices for what sin and all the laws of the Old Testament… I am doing my best to get through those – to honor my FATHER, because if HE put it there, it must be important to HIM, and if you love someone, you listen to what they have to say, even if not everything is 100% thrillingly interesting to you all the time – right?
Why would I pray, seek GOD’s face all the time, ask HIS advice for everything and then go my own way without HIM – that would make absolutely no sense at all!
So as I had mentioned, the storm in my life is raging – however, I’ve had more and more peace in the storm the more I prayed for GOD’s will to be done!
I am even convinced that I got the assignment to START this storm from GOD!
A bit like the kings in the Old Testament when GOD told them to go to battle!
I am sure it won’t be a surprise for anyone if I told you that my will would be for the storm to be over as quickly as possible or even for GOD to spare me from going through the storm, or even better, not only from going through this storm, but from going through any storm to come as well!
That’s not how it works though.
That’s not how GOD works – at least not in my life!
The storm in my workplace, it is extremely unpleasant for ME, as I had just asked GOD to grant me a new job and all I want is to leave there, but what is happening now is that after all these weeks of fighting, my concerns are being heard and there are investigations going on about what I raised and about what I mentioned and the entire place, team and situation is being shaken up, they are looking into things…. I may get a warning still….. but GOD turned the situation a little bit already….. and I know that I am not fighting this fight for myself.
Because me myself, I am not a hero!
In fact, I am quite a coward inside… if I had my way, I would just live in peace with everyone and me, I would leave everyone alone!
But that’s not GOD’s assignment for me.
Even all my spiritual battles, I would have fought NONE of them.
If it had been up to me.
But GOD gave me the strength, the power and the knowledge to fight through all of them – and I am still here.
I am here to tell the tale and to hopefully help others.
The same thing with my job.
The issues I have raised will help my team mates.
Because the changes that will come from my battles with the management, my colleagues will benefit from them, even after I will have left – because the managers will have to learn from all this!
And that’s exactly what happened in the last job!
In fact, even when I was still very young, in school, I was always elected the speaker of the class and wherever I am, in a team at work, in a church, in a circle of friends, even in my original family – I am always the one speaking and addressing what is going wrong.
Speaking the truth and thus bringing a change to the atmosphere, addressing the “elephant in the room” when everyone has been walking around it for too long…
Even here on my blog – speaking about what’s going wrong in the churches, doing my best to educate people about the lies the occult/ the enemy tries to feed them…
It’s the role GOD has given me.
I am a warrior for the truth and thus for GOD.
It’s not a nice role.
Not one I would have chosen.
Even the articles I write on here, I know many people are alienated by my kind of work for GOD, by what I say, because they don’t want to hear about these things, about demons, witchcraft, black magic, sex magic, astral projection, witches and warlocks and rape in dreams….
But it’s my assignment.
To speak about these things, so that those who cannot speak for themselves will have help!
So I do understand my assignments and I see patterns and I let go of what I would rather do or what role I would rather have and I carry my cross and do what GOD tells me to do – sometimes, I am lucky and happy when a sister or brother understands and appreciates me for what I am doing – but I am also cool with being rejected and ostracized for it.
So much for the things I do understand that I am doing them for GOD.
But I am sometimes pondering about those plans that I believe are mine.
Are they truly mine?
Coming from me?
Or does GOD put plans and desires in our hearts and then lets us contend for them and even pray for what HE wants us to have?
Not sure if this makes any sense?
If I could explain it, it’s probably best with what I feel is my calling:
to minister to men in prison.
I would have never thought that that’s what I want to do.
Would have never believed how much I have the urge to do it and how much joy and satisfaction I get from it.
I do see how much this joy is connected to the evil that I have been put through by satanic abuse – my own suffering, my own pain is so closely connected to my skills to help these men! My past is the main reason why I CAN help them, can understand them, can relate to their crimes and can forgive them even if they can’t forgive themselves!
Without my own past, my suffering, I would not be able to minister to them the way I do!
And without GOD leading me via so many detours and turns and failures, I would’ve never found this passion, this calling, this purpose for my life.
But there has been a time when I had to contend for it – even now, I am getting closer, but not yet 100% there… it’s a journey and GOD is there all the time, all the way…
So this one is definitely and always has been GOD’s plan for me.
And when I see how far I came in such a short time, without any previous qualifications in the field, it’s a mere miracle and it can only be because GOD wants me to get there.
But there has been a time when I thought this was a dream, an imagination coming from MY heart, and I may never get there…
And I am wondering about how those 2 are related?
I mean the dreams we have for ourselves.
And GOD’s plans for us.
Where do our dreams come from?
Obviously, we all know that things work out the best when our wishes and desires are aligned with GOD’s will for us, but what’s the connection between those 2?
The way I came to understand my own walk with GOD is that the more I seek HIM and the more I know him, HE puts desires in my heart, I then pray for them, contend for them, HE tests me and then eventually, HE will give me something HE wanted me to have and HE made me ask HIM for it.
That’s my understanding of GOD’s plans for me and of the process HE has put in place to get there…
What do you think, my friend?
Have you had any revelations about GOD’s plans for you and where they came from and how you deal with your own dreams and GOD’s assignments for you?
I am very curious to hear your opinion about it, my friend.
I hope and pray that this will encourage, inspire, heal and bless you.
And that THE LORD will bless you abundantly in all areas of your life.
That HE will keep you and shine HIS face upon you and bring you PEACE.
In JESUS’ name I pray.